D e a d P a p e rPoems |
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| Creative Journalism and Essays | |||
| Fiction | |||
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SALLY NIELSEN is an English composition and literature professor at Florida Community College at Jacksonville. She has also been an associate editor, contributing editor and a freelance journalist for publications in the Chicago area before coming to Florida. She has received awards for her fiction from the First Coast Writer’s Festival and New Millennium Writings. Most recently, her work has appeared in Skirt! Magazine, Studies in Popular Culture, and Kalliope, a Journal of Women’s Art. She holds an MA degree from the University of Illinois in Chicago in English. |
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Weekly Report from the Camel’s Eye TO: The Needle Board I have given everything away. Monday… Miss Lizzie, age refused, would like a day at the spa, cat food, books about the End Times, a red plastic coated shopping cart, and CWB. Accepted donation from an auction house representative: two hundred gilded Great Books of Western Civilization, a clip-on book lamp, a prayer stone, a Lands End tote bag containing used French milled hand soaps, Mexican serapes, and a tangled web of string. I told Miss Lizzie we do not have cigarettes, wine or beer. She said she understood our limitations. Tuesday ...Alfred Schum, 63, wants comfortable Bermuda shorts, size 40, some extra-large gold lamé shirts, one feed company cap, a box of toothpicks and a bus ticket to Tampa. Gave him what I found in back hallway: two empty money bags, one bent putter, a bag of golf tees, three extra-large Greg Norman golf shirts, and a raffle ticket for our church supper next week. Wednesday. ..Joe Green, 45, wants size 6 cowboy boots, tape players, Naomi Judd tapes, and a small woman who likes to bowl and has a low mileage truck with insurance paid up. Found these in a liquor box donated by a dwarf-sized man: a pair of men’s cargo pants, a small black leather jacket, a stack of Jimmy Buffet CDs, and one framed picture of a big-haired woman. Thursday ...John “Pinkie” Delano, 35, on his way to Las Vegas, requests one white men’s suit and a black men’s dress shirt, size 16, with long sleeves and gold buttons, and a pair of sunglasses. Gave him one man’s poison—cast-offs donated by a new member of Gamblers’ Anonymous: one set of New Age crystals, 1000 week-old lottery tickets, bundled, and three loaded dice in a leather bag....Karen Monson, 30, needs size 20 career work dresses, one pair size 10 black, low heeled women’s shoes, one suitcase, a handgun, and a restraining order. Gave her what I found in a suitcase thrown out of car window in front of the mission: one large men’s business suit, one pair of women’s red stiletto heels, size 9W, some women’s (large) sequined black silk underwear, and a tangled pair fishnet panty hose. I also gave her the last bathing suit, a size 2 women’s thong bikini hung from a clothespin, with an attached note that says, “never worn diet aid,” and a used cell phone. Friday. ..Tammy Bundles, 14, and baby Alexandria, 6 months, needs chewing gum, Depo-Provera shot, butterfly hair clips, baby clothes, comforters and a small red wagon. Gave her the new diaper bag stuffed with 150 folded baby clothes from The Baby Boutique, price tags attached, and a pink porcelain fairy godmother lamp, given by a disappointed grandmother who has identical twin grandsons....Molly and Dave, 10 and 8, dropped off by mother to wait for the bus to grandpa’s, asked for extra-large t-shirts, DVD tape players with headphones, and politely requested batteries be included. Matched with donation left by a former soccer mom: A box of soccer team shirts (“The Killer Mud Wasps”), dust bunnies, thirty electronic kids’ toys, one battery, no battery doors, and a stack of comic books titled In a Galaxy Not So Far Away. Saturday ...Pamela Smith, 21, needs to find the man she met last month who owns a black BMW with her stiletto heel marks on the inside of the backseat right hand door. Gave her a white silk bridal gown and one triple laced veil made in Paris delivered by a runaway bride and the motor scooter found on the back step that had no keys. A business card stuck to the seat said: Best Getaway Package in Town. Call Us, but discovered the phone number was disconnected. Yours, Vera Somewhat
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